When Your Dreams Feel Too Big: Balancing Ambition and Self-Compassion
Have you ever chased a dream so hard that it started to feel heavier than it did hopeful? The kind of season where you’re checking every box, meeting every deadline, doing everything “right” — yet somehow you still end up sitting in silence, wondering if you’ve taken on too much?
Jaclyn and Sam Thurmond know that feeling well. Recently, as they prepared for the arrival of their second baby, Jaclyn found herself sitting in a new rocking chair — tears streaming down her face — feeling crushed beneath the weight of everything she loved. Client work, book deadlines, business goals, toddler life, and baby prep all collided at once.
Sam sat beside her, listening — not to fix it, but to remind her that the same dreams causing pressure were the very blessings they once prayed for.
Together, they began unpacking what it means to dream big without losing yourself in the process.
Understanding Balancing Ambition and Self-Compassion
Both Jaclyn and Sam know what it’s like to push toward goals with tunnel vision. They’ve built multiple businesses from the ground up, poured their hearts into creative work, and learned to lead through long seasons of uncertainty.
But they’ve also learned that balancing ambition and self-compassion is essential to sustaining the life they’re creating. There’s a difference, Sam pointed out, between healthy drive and self-imposed pressure.
“Everything that’s overwhelming us right now,” he told Jaclyn, “is something we once prayed for. We just forget to pause and recognize that we’re standing in the answered prayer.”
That single thought reframed everything. Gratitude didn’t erase the exhaustion, but it softened it — reminding them both that success can still feel heavy, and that’s okay.
(Perspective, as they like to say, is the cheapest therapy there is.)
If you’re feeling stretched thin by your own dreams, you may love Calm Amidst Chaos: A Gentle Guide to Finding Peace in Uncertain Times. It’s a heart-level reminder that peace and purpose can coexist.
Why Slowing Down Doesn’t Mean Giving Up
When overwhelm hit its peak, Jaclyn and Sam both realized that slowing down wasn’t the same as quitting. It was an act of wisdom — a conscious recalibration of what actually matters.
Jaclyn noticed a pattern: every major breakthrough in her life had been preceded by some kind of breakdown. The tears, the stillness, the quiet — all of it cleared space for something new.
Sam agreed. Over the years, he’d learned that giving one important task his undivided focus was often more productive than multitasking across ten. “I can solve most problems in a day if I just give them my full attention,” he said. “It’s when I try to do everything that nothing moves.”
That small shift — focusing on less to accomplish more — became a shared mantra for them both.
The Season of Hibernation and Recalibration
Preparing for maternity leave gave Jaclyn and Sam a new metaphor for slowing down: hibernation and recalibration.
Seeds don’t grow overnight; they root first. Progress beneath the surface is still progress.
Jaclyn described this season as one of slowing down intentionally — tending to the baby, their home, and their peace before diving back into projects. Sam saw it as reprioritizing. “Sometimes,” he said, “slowing down just means deciding what actually deserves your energy.”
They both agreed: doing everything isn’t strength. Choosing what truly matters is.
If you’ve ever needed permission to rest, How To Start Healing From Anxiety: A Gentle Guide Rooted in Heart is a beautiful companion piece on letting go of constant striving.
Building Dreams with Grace, Not Grit Alone
Jaclyn admitted that she’s always been a “push through it” kind of person — but lately, grace has felt like a better teacher than grit.
One morning, after a restless night of pregnancy insomnia, she canceled her usual workout class. The old her would’ve felt guilty all day. The new her simply said, “Rest is the most productive thing I can do right now.”
Sam laughed and nodded — he’s more naturally laid-back, but he recognizes the importance of balance. “Grace doesn’t mean slacking,” he said. “It just means being human.”
(Because let’s be honest, grace builds more than grit ever could.)
If this theme resonates, check out How To Master Your Mindset. It’s a great companion to this conversation about growing with both strength and softness.
High Frequency Living: Joy, Trust, and Flow
Together, Jaclyn and Sam have built a life rooted in high frequency living — where joy, trust, and flow guide their choices more than fear or force.
They’ve both noticed how much easier things unfold when they lead from alignment rather than anxiety. As Jaclyn said, “When we try to manhandle everything, it feels like swimming upstream. But when we trust, it’s like floating — we still move forward, but it feels peaceful.”
They now protect small rituals that help them stay tuned in — no phone after 7 p.m., quiet car rides, long showers that double as meditations, and small acts of care that ground them back into their bodies.
Sam calls it “choosing focus.” Jaclyn calls it “listening for flow.” Together, they call it freedom.
You can explore more ways to find your own flow in How to Vibe Check Yourself (So You Can Actually Live Your Best Life).
Check-In Questions for Dreamers
Before wrapping up, Jaclyn and Sam shared a few reflection questions for anyone walking the tightrope between ambition and self-compassion:
Am I building a life — or just surviving one?
Is this pressure internal or external?
What do I need most right now — rest, support, or inspiration?
Can I trust that my dream is unfolding in divine timing?
They both agree: pressure is not the path. Alignment is.
(And being is just as important as doing — maybe even more.)
Final Thoughts
For Jaclyn and Sam, this conversation wasn’t just about burnout or busyness. It was about learning that self-compassion isn’t optional — it’s the foundation of everything sustainable and soulful.
They hope that anyone chasing something big remembers:
you don’t have to prove your worth by how tired you are.
Rest is not retreat. It’s what allows your dream to breathe.
Because when your dreams feel too big, grace becomes the bridge between who you are and who you’re becoming.
Live on purpose. Live on frequency.
Ien Araneta - editor of The Freq Show & The Beckon Times
